As someone that believes mindfulness is essential for balance and peace of mind in every day life, I found reading an article on mindful sex particularly interesting.
Whilst many probably believe they having sex mindfully, I can bet you at least 90% of those that claim they are, aren’t!
If you are in the middle of sex with your partner and suddenly your mind wanders over how many likes you got on your recent Instagram post or whether so and so has read that message you sent, that is a great indication of just how mindless your sex has become or is in that moment.
Accepting the idea that mindfulness is not only fantastic for every day balance but is also used to encourage healthy eating and even treat depression and anxiety, surely applying a similar approach to sex should give us all a little bit of a boost right?
I reckon so.
Mindfulness is the practice of being aware of thoughts and feelings in the present moment without judgement. Applying this to sex in theory is easy but could be more difficult in practice, especially if you have grown accustomed to certain things.
Mindful sex is about focusing on exactly what is happening as it happens.
If your partner is touching, stroking or licking a certain part of your body, focus into that – really focus, do not become distracted by other thoughts, really zone into that feel.
Focus on not only touch but smell too.
Use all your senses.
Notice how nice that person smells, tune into the sound of their voice…
Be 100% in that moment!
If your mind does drift off, gently bring it back to where you are at and continue focus.
Don’t beat yourself up if you find you are distracted more than you can focus. Obviously, being able to zone in and maintain focus is something that probably won’t happen straight away, it will take practice. It needs to become a way of life in the same way practicing mindfulness in everyday life is.
Not only is mindful sex arguably better sex, but I believe that this could be the key to addressing many sexual issues an individual may experience like erectile dysfunction and an inability to orgasm.
If it’s not the solution it would definitely go some way toward helping at least.
I think we’ll explore that in more depth sometime soon but yeah, mindful sex, try it when you can and see if it makes a difference.
